Ban Rush Hour Driving Lessons

Quite simply, all learner drivers should be banned from the road between 7am - 9am and 5pm - 7pm. I don't want to be stuck behind a learner driver tailback trundling along at 20mph, or have to wait for ages behind one at a junction for them to find a gap a suitable number of football pitches long to pull out in to.

It should be illegal for driving instructors to give a lesson during the hours mentioned at the top of this article. From the commuters point of view, we've got somewhere to be, and we need to get there as quickly and as 'leagally' possible. Learner drivers further clog up, clogged up roads to the point of a horn honking, steering wheel hitting, screaming fit of anger. (Me, only in extreme cases of being held up). From the learner drivers point of view, its a bit of a waste of time to be sitting in traffic for the length of their lesson, and it must be a bit nerve racking learning to drive during the rush hour?

'Lord' Alan Sugar called me a twit.... twice!

Yesterday Alan Sugar was on a bit of a political rant on twitter. And I merely pointed out to him that he should really be seen as impartial, seeing as though he is on one of the BBC's flagship tv shows. The BBC are supposed to be impartial and AMS had faced calls to be axed from the BBC when he was a Labour Tsar Advisor Publicity Stunt. Tweets below...

Supermarket Checkout Etiquette

I have previously written a blog post about people who jump the queue to pay for petrol, and thinking about it, there's so many more things people do at a supermarket checkout that they just shouldn't be allowed to do. Here is a run down of the top 5 things that should be banned at supermarket checkouts...

A Twitter Shirt Giveaway Competition - Nice Idea, Poor Planning and Piss Poor Execution

What was the competition?
As you may know, last week Puma ran a "treasure hunt" competition in which they released a clue to all followers of BeInThatNumber on twitter as to the location of 20 free Spurs shirts between Friday and Tuesday 4pm-6pm each day. To allow fans to get them a week or so before they were available to everyone else. That sounds great you would say. Win win situation for both fans and puma? In theory yes...Puma gets thousands of followers on twitter to contact about future Spurs shirt sales and they drum up excitement about the upcoming shirt release, and Spurs fans get free shirts. But in practice, it didn't work to well....

Charity Muggers (Chuggers)

Wearing brightly coloured rain jackets, shiny badges and clutching an important looking clipboard, Charity Muggers are a plague on our streets.
Often hunting in packs, they spread out their 5-or so man team down a high street. Usually on alternating sides of the road, forcing people to continuously cross the road to avoid them.

Charities pay huge sums to firms that employ so-called 'charity muggers' who stop people in the street and try to persuade them to donate by direct debit.
But the charities often don't see a penny of this donated money because the 'chugging' firm charges are so high.
But a BBC investigation found the charities are often paying the companies, in effect, £100 or more for each signature they collect – meaning in many cases the company is paid more than the charity will raise from that donor in the first year.
And many of those signed up by these sub-contractors do not complete 12 months of donations.

Term Time Traffic

I miss the school summer holidays. No, I'm not talking about when I was younger. I'm talking about last week. Last week, during rush hour, the roads were relatively empty during the commute to work...
No queuing at junctions and roundabouts, no queues on the motorways. For those 6 weeks, driving to work is bliss. But then, apparently kids need educating, so school resumes, and the roads are clogged up with parents driving their kids to school and the parents that have taken the holidays off and are back to work. The endless queues resume and a minimum of 15 minutes of pure tedium are instantly added to my journey.

Today was alright. It's the Muslim festival of Eid today, and as I live in the culturally diverse city of London, lots of schools have a day off. Good times. Only two weeks until half term and quiet roads again. Bring it on. Have a uncretinous weekend people!

Something UN-cretinous For the Weekend

***Good Mood Begin!***

Voucher code websites. If you aren't using them yet, you should be. Most online companies or highstreet restuarants have some sort of voucher deal being run at any one time. I always check the web for vouchers before I buy something or make a hotel booking or go out for a meal or whatever. Just recently I got 25% off a hotel booking, 15% off a computer game and (effectivley) two pizzas for one at Pizza Express.

There are plenty of voucher code websites out there to use, but I find VoucherHub to be the best one, as people can vote on each discount code, so you don't get some cretin wasting your time by posting things for 99% off, because people will just vote it down once they realise it doesn't work. Just bookmark the site, and before you make a purchase online, go visit voucher hub and see if there is a voucher code for that particular online retailer. Simple!

Anyway, enough waffle, go here, get a pizza voucher, get down to pizza express weekend and treat yourself.
***Good Mood End!***

Inconsiderate Parking

I drive to work, so inconsiderate parking really affects me as I struggle to find a parking space in our world of ever decreasing parking spaces. I've got a few pictures of the main examples that annoy me.

The first one (right), the silver VW parked up in a bay on the side of the road. Not only a mile away from the kerb, but smack bang in the middle of a parking space big enough for two cars. Idiot. Either pull forward or backwards to the bumper of the next car and you free up a bit of space for somebody else. Whether its because they can't be bothered, or they just want to be able to drive out of the space nice and easily, it's irritating. It should be made law that we are allowed to smash the window, take the handbrake off and push the car out of the way.

I've been lard off...

I often browse the Sun newspaper, as its a goldmine of cretinous things. I saw this story in the newspaper today:

A 30-STONE factory worker has been laid off - in case he falls on his pals and CRUSHES them.

Tubby Barry Fowers had to climb on platforms despite being prone to blackouts.

But he was considered a danger to himself and others and took an offer of redundancy at his job making power equipment.

Despite his list of ailments, Barry, of Burton on Trent, Staffs, has been refused incapacity benefit after leaving his job at Crestchic. He gets £21.65-a-week Jobseeker's Allowance.

The angry dad of one said: "I've paid tax for 34 years and should get something in return."

Wife Shirley said: "We want this payment changed."
-----------------------

So, to summarise, a man who gets fat, through no fault of the tax payer, is too fat to do his job, SAYS YES to the offer of redundancy, and wants incapacity benefit now that he's not working, because he has paid tax for 34 years and should get something in return?! Something in return for being fat and voluntarily not working? How about the fact that that by paying tax and being a citzen of this country, the government has already ensured that he was fed, clothed, educated, sheltered, given him job seekers allowance to allow him to seek a job, and given him free NHS health care for when his over active mouth lands him up in hospital with obesity related illnesses?! Too bloody right it was refused! And what's his wife on about "We want this payment changed"?! To what?! A gym membership? Actually... not a bad idea love.

Bob Crow and the RMT - Get back to work!

Hi! I'm Bob Crow, I earn over £124k p.a and I'm here to fuck your day up!

This is Bob Crow. Leader of the RMT Union. The odious little shite that is causing so much grief for Londoners right now.

London is in the middle of yet another tube strike called for by Crow and his Crow-nies. This time he is asking for assurances that some 800 jobs won't be cut. The response was that 800 jobs wouldn't be cut compulsorily. Bob Crow, who seems not to understand the art of peaceful negotiation told them to shove it and here we are.

Slow Walking People

Slow walking people, they do my head in. Especially in London. The only time I and the majority of other Londoners ever go into the centre of London, I'm there to do something. I need to get places. Be it work, shopping or whatever, I don't want to be dodging people that are forever stopping to take pictures, a massive fat family walking side by side taking up the whole pavement, or people that stop, or change direction and speed randomly in a busy street.

Me vs Petrol Jumpers

You're probably wondering what a Petrol Jumper is?
You've all seen them, you are waiting in line at your local tescos metro/extra, or any other petrol station and shop establishment, having just filled up your car. Whether you have bought something in the shop aswell as your petrol or not. And some self important looking person comes in, walks straight up to the till and says, "I'm just paying for petrol" and automatically assumes that this gives him/her the right to jump the queue. Well, this happened this morning to me, and well, anyone who's seen me in the morning, knows I'm not a morning person, so I had to challenge them. This is the conversation that followed: